Friday, January 25, 2013


I write this as I head on a Spiritual Retreat organised by The Office at the Youth Camp in Eyenkorin (literally Birds are Singing) in Kwara State.
Its been a wonderful 3 months working at The Office, but its time I move on. Its 2013, great things are demanded of me.
Yesterday, I read pieces by two friends who also blog, Tomiwa of Idea Fun House and Dr Seyi who writes Tha Watcha and its their words that inspired this piece.
The Watcha wrote a poem. It was a simple piece, yet beautiful. It typified the person I knew as LayLow, poetry personified in motion.
The other piece was also a poem. Simple, short and powerful. Am still pondering the full meaning. Its got me thinking. Just like the man Tomiwa does every time I see him. An idea junkie. An absolute intellectual.
I slept with both pieces on my mind, running in the background in the space we call the subconscious. They woke me up this morning. I still can't get it off my mind. I ponder and wonder, challenged by my friends, inspired by my contemporaries.
At The Office Retreat, Mr Dre and Mr Dimeji rehashed the early life of The Company. Two young men who decided to venture into the unknown and die trying. They knew each other before but only met each other in the final year of school. They surrounded themselves with people who had similar dreams and watched theirs birthed and grow. Focus, courage, persistence, tenacity. That is the story of IT Vessel Nigeria Limited- The Company. Two years later, it is bearing fruits. Not fruit, but fruits.
Its four a.m. and am lying awake on the couch in the living room. I can't even remember sleeping off. I must have been super duper tired. I woke up at three and am still on the couch. Where did the magic of childhood go, of sleeping on the couch and magically waking up on my bed?
I stumble upon Tomiwa's blog (again) and remember that I have not finished this piece on bonds. Once again, I have been challenged. I have been inspired to start something and finish it. Maybe I'll finally get the urge to finish the other articles lying in cryogenic storage on my laptop. To have an idea is genius, to implement, divine.
The quality of our life is going to be greatly determined by the kind of people we surround ourselves with. No matter the number of books you read or the number of seminars you attend, if you do not associate with people who are heading in the same direction as you are, you will be slowed down, lose focus and become disoriented. Your friends are not just to have fun together. You should help achieve each other's dreams.
Choose your friends wisely.
Am glad I have the kind of friends I currently do.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Its the middle of the night; the wind stirs the leaves and drives sand particles against my window. Suddenly, rain drops patter my roof. The tap-tap-tap beats reminding me of JSS3 and JP Clarke. JSS 3, where I really first fell in love. But that's another story for another day. Clouds blot out the stars as rain falls. The sky cries until it can cry no more and after the rain, the early morning sun smiles. Slowly I get up from bed and sniff the air. It is a smell like no other.; an aroma I have since birth learned to love, though not always welcome. The smell of the first rains, the smell of birth. Its the end of the dry dusty harmattan and winter. Heralds of spring. A new beginning. Rebirth and life. Petrichor
When I was first started out to start this piece, I was confused. My heart was full of inspiration yet my head was devoid of ideas. And just like the prodigal son of old tales, I remembered my roots; alomo bitter and opa eyin, twin muses, if there ever was. I went into meditation with liquid inspiration in a really dark part of town (don't ask me where. Its my private ashram). Slowly, I could hear the leaves stirring. I could smell it. See the cobwebs clearing from my vision. From my trance, I got up and left my ashram. I left and headed for tipper garage. I stopped at the okada park there and just observed life through the lens of sages past; with the clear, unclouded eyes of  ancestors at elemu joints and in the spirits, locally-brewed version. Like an old testament prophet receiving a vision, it slowly dawned on me that I was not there by my own choosing. Providence had led me here. Take 1, National distraction album, Side 1, Tanke Tipper Garage. From relative calm and camaradie, wily old Nick reared his head and a fight nearly broke out. Someone was revving his bike and raising hell. An ibadan man with full NAFDAC number (I counted it sef) spoke to him and told him to stop. He complied and was talking to a friend about how Jincheng makes more noise than Bajaj. Suddenly, Mr. Ibadan man picked offence at some other things the Agatu guy said and proceeded to lock him by his shirt and that even his father (Mr. Agatu's dad) dare not talk to him in that way. Like a possessed priest, he uttered incantations and pronounced that his parents were going to cry over him. Before we knew what was happening, they were close to blows. A young guy with an older man with a family and kids at home. They were eventually separated but still continued hurtling abuses and curses on each other. Mr. Ibadan suddenly ran to his machine and brought something out. My eyes at this point were a bit hazy and I couldn't see clearly what it was but reliable witnesses later told me he wanted to add african power to balance out the equation. Nothing eventually came of it and the fight was prevented.
Its amazing how things can slowly snowball. One moment, things are calm, the next stormy. A quiet conversation between friends suddenly turns into a shouting match and blows fly. Someone sees a bottle nearby and decides to use it. Blood follows, a life is lost; cut down in the prime of life by a life companion.
While we can't expect everybody we meet to act in a rational manner, we can control how we react to issues. Hot temper has never gotten anyone anywhere, I hear my father speaking to me with the authority and wisdom of one who has seen this world and the next. Its the meek that inherit the earth. After the red mist; the stormy winds and rains, the eyes clear, all things appear afresh, so said the Spirits of the bottle to me. Reign your emotions. Petrichor. The sweet smell after the storm.

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Things You Should Never Do on Social Media

The last few weeks have been really crazy on social media, what with the tragic Cynthia issue, the John/Jide story (fact or fiction, I don’t even know) and "The Lists" that have been popping up. Whether good or bad, I don’t even know. On one hand, we've had cause for sober reflections and on the other, well, let's just say that idleness is next to stupidity. At least it’s kept one distracted from the woes of the land, the latest being Madam Perm Sec’s illness and Oga mouthpiece’s denial. Maybe it’s all part of the National Distraction Album, version 2012.
While undeniably social media has given us new ways to express ourselves I think we still have to remember that with new strength comes new responsibility. Just as most of us wouldn’t willingly run our mouth in public, irresponsible social media attitude can potentially ruin you and negatively impact your career, not to mention hurt others in the process. Here are some social media mistakes that  you should avoid at all costs, because when it’s all said and done, it’s never as simple as "privacy settings" or simply ‘unfriending’ someone on Facebook or blocking on Twitter.

  • Never Post Illegal Activities
Please! This should be a no-brainer. It might be a spur of the moment thing, a need to vent but trust me, it’s not smart to announce "badass" things you've done or certain organization(s) you belong to that the law frowns upon on social media. 19-year-old bank employee Estefany Martinez and her boyfriend Ricky "Ricko Gee" Gonazalez got themselves nabbed after a successful bank robbery through their Facebook posts. Ditto Jesse Hippolite. But still, planning a murder, carrying it out and then publishing it a la  Daniele Piampaschet and Krystian Bala style still has my deepest respects (not that I’d do anything like that). Even if your profile is set to private, a "friend" can always download, save and share incriminating photos and screen-grab posts that he or she or the authorities can use against you in the future.
Periodically review information and content on your social media in that way, you can untag yourself from pictures you wouldn't want to make public and delete posts that shouldn't have been up in the first instance.

  • Cyber Bullying's A Definite No
You may think its all fun and games but picking on someone or writing embarrassing stuff about people is so not cool, even if it’s just on social media. When under any guise you turn to social media, blogs or virtually any online space as a forum for hurtful, hateful and often untrue speech against a person or a group of people, the risks are immeasurable. It can lead to violence, suicide, depression and discrimination and even incite sectarian violence. In my opinion, when people get sued for libel and writing half truths and outright lies, people will learn to watch what they post.
And don't think it’s restricted to your peers. People who trash talk their teachers, bosses and superiors are doing themselves a great disservice. You may think they will not know but others might see it and tell them about it. You should even be wary of school/workplace or boss/teacher-related posts you think are harmless you never know whose feelings you might accidentally hurt. I remember several classmates of mine "liking" a post our level adviser had up about a friend of his that died. Needless to say, they didn't endear themselves to him.
Some institutions and companies thoroughly investigate the social media activity and personalities of applicants and employees these days. One negative tweet about specific topics, institutions and or geographical areas these days, could seal your fate.

  • Never Post Confidential Information
This is and has always been my mantra on social media. What's your house address doing on Facebook? Or your phone number or blackberry pin, if you intend to make it public information. Anybody can pretend to be anybody on social media. Protect yourself and your loved ones from stalkers. Try and avoid overtly specific check-ins too. You can be traced through them.
One other thing: am amazed by girls who post their bb pins on social media and ask how you got it. If you don't want add requests, you shouldn't have shared in the first place.
And we don't want to know how many of your Facebook or 2go friends or twitter followers you've slept with. She may be naïve to trust you, but it isn't our business.

  • Never Post Emotionally
We've all said and done things in the spur of the moment we later felt sorry about. It’s human nature to sometimes let the red mist take over and cloud our better judgement. Those times are the worst moments to pick up your blackberry and post on social media. As much as possible, try to calm down and imagine the consequences of your posts and how it can affect  the feelings, safety and well-being of those around you even the person that probably got you riled up.
Am sure Adele and Taylor Swift didn't record the first words that came to their minds when they got heart-broken.

  • Never Threaten Violence
That dude has slighted you and you are as mad as hell. You want to put the fear of God into them so you go on social media and threaten the person. Or GEJ and his people have done it again with another unpopular law or action so you go on social media and threaten to blow up somewhere. In these days of Boko Haram. I see jail time in your future, my friend if you do not cease and desist.
Even posting an anonymous, empty threat to an obscure online forum full of strangers can set alarm bells ringing. In the United States, a student named Alexander Song (not the Barcelona player oo) posted his intentions to Reddit:  “to kill enough people to make it to national news.” Police located the young man and arrested him at school, despite the fact that he carried no weapons.
Social media is not the place to vent your frustrations and violent thoughts. Posting an angry tweet in the heat of the moment may feel cathartic, but the momentary pleasure you get from writing it isn’t worth the potential harm it could create. Take a moment to breathe, think and reboot.

  • Never Use Unprofessional Public Profiles
Whether you are in school or out of school, employed or still searching for a job, you profile is going to determine to a large extent how people view you at first glance.
Whether it’s a Google search or a social media examination, chances are someone is looking into your history. And sometimes, even a completely private social media profile sets off red flags for employers. In today’s age of transparency, a professional (albeit public) profile is the ideal.
Whenever I evaluate a potential employee, I always take a look at what is publicly visible on their Facebook profile,” says Ryan Cohn, vice president of social/digital operations at What’s Next Marketing. “On two separate occasions, I have rejected entry level prospects (finishing their senior year of college) for featuring firearms in their profile picture. Both were qualified in terms of experience and otherwise would have been worthy of an interview.Andrew Moravick, social media specialist at SnapApp says “If you don’t want something to be seen, dont post it on the Internet.”
For many, who think social media isn’t serious, wait until you happen to work for a professional who is active on twitter or is you friend on Facebook. I have had bosses who were active on social media so I know

Monday, August 20, 2012

August 20, 2012.
Dear diary,
 Yesterday wasn’t so good. Spent most of the day puking my guts out. I still don’t know what it was exactly I ate. It nearly turned out to be a very rotten day but the EPL drama spiced it up. Absolute thrillers all through. It’s nice to see Eden Hazard start his EPL career on a very bright note, even if he’s a Chelski man.  Two assists (yes, I call pks assists too) against Wigan in the opening 6 minutes must really do a lot for his already bloated ego.  He turned out to be the difference between the two sides, although he fizzled out as the game went on. Let’s see how he finishes this season sha. Victor Moses also put up a good showing. Though he was absent for most of the first half, he completely took control of the left flank in the second and Ivanovic eat the grass on more than one occasion. A pity Wigan couldn’t find a goal. They really deserved one.
 Man Shitty-Southhampton. Nice to see the noisy neighbors get a good run for their bottomless purse at their own home ground. That annoying vile frenchie just had to spoil the party again. He scored a beautiful goal to win the match for them. The oil money boys seem to have started the season exactly as they finished last season, doing what is required to win matches. They have begun to show signs of becoming champions- the will of fire to win. The title will stay at Manchester this season, though am not sure which half of Manchester will have bragging rights.
Went through my RSS filters today and got really bad news. Top director Tony Scott jumped off a bridge yesterday in Los Angeles in broad day light. Eye witness accounts say he parked his car and jumped without hesitating (talk about guts). I didn’t know until I read his bio this morning that he had directed a lot of my favorite films. During his career, Tony directed 16 feature films, and a lot more music videos and TV commercials. He was the man behind The Hunger (1983), Top Gun (1986), Beverly Hills Cop II (1987), Revenge (1990), Days of Thunder (1990), The Last Boy Scout (1991), True Romance (1993), Crimson Tide (1995), The Fan (1996), Enemy of the State (1998), Spy Game (2001), Man on Fire (2004),Domino (2005), Déjà Vu (2006), The Taking of Pelham 123 (2009),Unstoppable (2010).  Tony’s films were action-packed blockbusters, and most of them were box office successes with Enemy of the State being the highest grossing movie in 1990s.
His works also included The Hunger (1 episode in 1997 and 1 in 1999), AFP: American Fighter Pilot, Executive producer (2002), Numb3rs, Executive producer (2009 to 2010), The Good Wife, Executive producer (2009–2012), Gettysburg, Executive producer (2011), and Labyrinth, Executive producer (2012) all for television. He also directed short films including Loving Memory (1969), One of the Missing (1971), The Hire: Beat the Devil (2002) and Agent Orange (2004). Commercials he directed include DIM Underwear (1979), Player, Achievements and Big Bang for Barclays Bank (2000), Telecom Italia (2000) (Starring Marlon Brando and Woody Allen), Ice Soldier for US Army (even the army advertises) in 2002 and One Man, One Land for Marlboro (2003).
For more info, read my last post.
Mr. Scott had a very successful career. Most of his films were successful box office hits. He had money, had a family (3 wives and two twin sons from wife number 3)  and his elder brother was also a director and am sure was loved, admired and respected by many in his chosen field yet he chose to end it all by jumping-off a bridge 185-feet high. Seems success is not all its made out to be.

Blockbuster Director jumps off bridge

English film director Anthony Scott is dead. He jumped off the off the Vincent Thomas Bridge in the San Pedro port district of Los Angeles, California at about 12:30 pm local time on  August 19, 2012.
Scott, born in North Shields, Northumberland, in England, and frequently captured behind the camera in his signature faded red baseball cap, is credited with directing more than two dozen movies and television shows and producing nearly 50 titles.
Best known for muscular but stylish high-octane thrillers that showcased some of Hollywood's biggest stars in a career dated back to the 1980s and established him as one of the most successful action directors in the movie industry.
Tony Scott’s started out directing music videos and commercials. His first shot at directing a feature film was the direct adaptation of the Henry James story The Author of Beltraffio for French television in 1975, a project he landed by virtue of winning a coin-flip against his brother. His next film was the vampire film The Hunger, in 1982. The Hunger starred David Bowie and Catherine Deneuve and introduced Willem Dafoe in a small role. The Hunger had elaborate photography and sumptuous production design, but it failed to find an audience, received harsh reviews by critics, and had disappointing box office sales (though it later became a cult favourite).
In 1985, producers Don Simpson and Jerry Bruckheimer approached Scott to direct Top Gun. Scott, though reluctant at first, agreed to direct Top Gun. Though the film received mixed critical review, it became one of the highest-grossing films of 1986, taking in more than US$176 million, and making a star of its young lead, Tom Cruise. Following Top Gun's success, Scott found himself on Hollywood's A list of action directors.  He reteamed with Simpson and Bruckheimer in 1987 to direct Eddie Murphy and Brigitte Nielsen in Beverly Hills Cop II in 1987 which also went on to become one of that year’s  highest  grosser. His next film, Revenge (1990), starred Kevin Costner, Madeleine Stowe and Anthony Quinn. Revenge was followed by Days of Thunder starring Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman.
Other films he directed included The Last Boy Scout (1991) and True Romance (1993) from a script by Quentin Tarantino and Roger Avary. The cast included Christian Slater, Patricia Arquette, Dennis Hopper, Christopher Walken, Gary Oldman, Brad Pitt, Tom Sizemore, Chris Penn, Val Kilmer and in bit roles, James Gandolfini and Samuel L. Jackson. Scott's next film, Crimson Tide (1995), was a submarine thriller starring Gene Hackman and Denzel Washington. The Fan (1996) came next and starred Robert De Niro, Wesley Snipes, Ellen Barkin and Benicio del Toro. Scott's 1998 film Enemy of the State, a conspiracy thriller, starred Will Smith and Gene Hackman, and was his highest-grossing film of the decade.
Spy Game was released during the Thanksgiving holiday of 2001. It starred Robert Redford and Brad Pitt and made about 60 million dollars at the U.S. box office. Man on Fire was released in April 2004 and made over 75 million dollars at the U.S. box office. It starred Denzel Washington, Christopher Walken, Dakota Fanning, Radha Mitchell, Giancarlo Giannini, Marc Anthony, Rachel Ticotin and Mickey Rourke. Next for Scott came Domino (2005) starring Keira Knightley. In autumn 2006, Scott reteamed with Denzel Washington for the futuristic action film Déjà Vu.  Scott once again teamed up with Denzel Washington on The Taking of Pelham 123, which also starred John Travolta and was released in theaters on 12 June 2009. The film was a remake of the 1974 film of the same title starring Walter Matthau and Robert Shaw. His last feature film was Unstoppable, again starring Washington with Chris Pine.
According to Lieutenant Joe Bale, a watch commander for the Los Angeles coroner's office, onlookers saw Scott, 68, parking his car, a Black Toyota Prius on the bridge and then leap into the water below without hesitating. Investigators from the Los Angeles Police Department’s harbor division found contact information in his car and a suicide note in his office. Scott’s body was later recovered by law enforcement from the harbor shortly before 3 p.m. and was subsequently identified as being that of the filmmaker and younger brother of fellow movie director Ridley Scott.
Scott is survived by his wife, Donna Wilson Scott, and their twin sons, Frank and Max.
May his soul find peace.

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Made in China: China accused of copying American sitcom "Friends"

China is world-famous for many things; Olympic medals, Chinese food, large population and their manufacturing prowess. And oh, before I forget, they are also world-famous for "copying". In the past, it used to be just manufactured stuff. Now, it seems like they are including tv shows to their list of made-in-china products.

A group of attractive young people living in adjacent apartments, who spent a lot of time hanging out in coffee shops and talking about their lives: the Chinese TV sitcom "Ipartment" is basically Friends in a different language. But viewers are complaining that Ipartment is crossing the line between homage and outright theft, with entire scenes and whole swaths of dialogue copied verbatim from the hit ’90s sitcom and other American TV shows.

China’s version follows the lives of seven friends and neighbors in Shanghai (Friends, for a refresher, focused on the inhabitants of two neighboring New York City walkups). Some of the characters have similar jobs to those in the American version, such as a computer programmer and university lecturer.

Ipartment, which debuted in 2009 from the Shanghai Film Group, has run long enough now that viewers have taken to message boards and Sina Weibo—China’s massive Twitter-like social media service—to allege that entire scenes have been lifted word for word right out of American sitcoms like Friends, How I Met Your Mother and The Big Bang Theory.

The mainland tabloid Global Times says that Ipartment’s producers admit to using jokes from “various sources,” according to The Telegraph, but deny that they full-on copy from other shows, although they have apologized to one joke writer and offered compensation for using the jokes without permission.

The show’s representative says “comedies have stereotypes, like the handsome man, the gorgeous woman, the cheap man and so on. They have that in many comedies. Our creation is not plagiarism, but more a homage to the American sitcom.”

Culled from The Times

Anyway sha. We know say China tin no dey last.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Social Engineering 101 Practicals

On a sultry Friday afternoon with absolutely nothing to do, I had a mad dash of inspiration from a friend that involved a little bit of social engineering.  For those of you who know what social engineering is, rest easy, am not a matchstick man about to regal you with tales of cons pulled off on unsuspecting albeit greedy ,yes, greedy people (No offense, freedom of speech, yada yada yada). And for those of you who don't, please ask Google.
This bit of “engineering” involved setting up an account on a social networking site and pretending to be a siren. A beautiful friend of mine was generous enough to provide photos me with pictures of all sorts (if u get my drift, say amen).
I’ve never been so inundated with requests in my life! Within thirty minutes I had lots of guys who wanted to see pictures of my slutty p@@@y, boobs and hot, wet, tight p****y . Within 3 hours, I must have had close to 100 requests. I*S*Y*N*.  See how guys were so desperate to set P.
In a way, you could call it my glimpse into the world of the average girl. Add that to the number of desperate looking guys who are so looking to hook up and get your number and I begin to realize why so many of them can afford to do shakara. Guys, some of you are trying too hard. Build your game.  Become a better you and the ladies will come. When you are fishing, u won’t catch anything by stirring the water. Set the right bait and wait for the fish. They will surely bite. And don’t be afraid to shut them in the friend zone before they zone you.
And another thing.
So many people are too quick to give out info on things like where they work, where they live, their telephone number, schools they went to, date of birth and family on social media. In these days of psychos, identity thieves and internet scamsters, such information in the wrong hands, could be very damaging.  While trying to impress people or sound cool, DO NOT JEOPARDIZE UR SAFETY and those of your loved ones. Remember, anybody can be anybody online.